What it is bloggers?
Before I even begin to take any further criticism I will put it in writing to say "I SUCK at BLOGGING."
Now I don't suck at the ability to provide entertaining material, this is fact. But I just put the laptop down and didn't have the urge to blog. Not because there wasn't plenty of things to highlight such as BARACK OBAMA winning the election, trend of firing coaches in sports, or the Cheddar Bobs of New York who shoot themselves, President Bush getting his head hunted by size 10 penny loafers, I could go on and on.
The fact that remains is I've been on a blog hiatus that was much longer than usual because I had a lot of things in my personal life to focus on (and I took an oath to never pay comcast again for such poor service). But 2008 has been a big year for me and 2009 will be much bigger.
So I'm back on my blog tip, and considering it is the holiday season I am going to give the gift of laughter and entertainment via whatjlbthinks.blogspot.com.
One blog (not counting this one) each day until Christmas!!! Please Please Please send me suggestions if there's something that you want me to blog about otherwise you'll have to just wait and see what I bring under the blogger Christmas tree.
Funny video that all my blackberry users can appreciate. "Not in can girl we buy by the JUG"
Oscar Award winning rap group 36 Mafia has made their career with heavy hitting bass driven tracks that could be heard in the clubs and even in the cars that pass through your neighborhood.
I've never been a fan of 36 but they have a few records that would get me going in the disco. Recently they've put out their own version of lollipop entitled "Lolli Lolli" which is absolutely horrible BUT they've managed to catch my ear with one track off of their latest installment entitled Last 2 Walk.
The name of the track in which I am referring to is "I'd Rather." We all have things that we'd rather do than go to work or class but this song is of no reference to either.
The chorus says "I love having sex but I'd rather get some head," and that my bloggers, is quite the statement.
I first heard this song on the music channel on cable back on July 4th 2008 and I thought it was hilarious. Not because these guys rather receive oral pleasure than have intercourse but because the chorus is straight forward and doesn't cut any cards. Much like myself.
So as I listened to this song over and over again I began to wonder. How important is oral sex in a relationship? And could it MAKE or BREAK the relationship?
Anybody who says sex isn't as important in a relationship as communication and honesty probably thinks they're a "real boy" and has a father named Jeppetto because that's a load of bull. Sexual chemistry is a major factor in any relationship and two people should be as comfortable sexually with one another as they are having a conversation. Because like I said, both are important factors.
Oral sex is a form of sex that typically is performed as a type of foreplay and in some cases can be a substitute for intercourse. As a man, if you've experienced bad, "ok," and great oral sex you know that it can make a girl you like just a little bit, transform in to a girl you like a lot. I believe that oral sex is extremely important in a relationship and there are several reasons why.
The first reason it is important is because oral sex or "head" if you will, was taboo for such a long time, especially in the black community but it isn't anymore. Black women would always accuse brothers, and some still do, of running to the white woman because they felt white women are freaky/kinky (givers of the aforementioned head). I saw a comedian once who said in his routine "sisters ain't start giving head until Hennessy became popular." I thought that was the funniest part of his routine because for a long time black women wouldn't perform oral sex and if they did they weren't honest about the fact they did it, because they worried about how they would be perceived. Chris Rock also said in a stand up special "They still make you?" in reference to a woman who said she doesn't give oral. So in 2008 it's expected that women, mainly a black women, partakes in oral sex because it's a new age, and giving "head" is no longer taboo.
The second reason oral sex is important is because there are instances when women can't physically provide intercourse but we as men still have a needs to fulfill. For instance if a woman has a child, her love canal is in stitches for 6 weeks or so and the man can't row his canoe within it. There is also that week or so every month when women are on their monthly cycles and it is uncouth to engage in intercourse. So I pose this question, to all women: Should a man be reduced to pleasing himself or receiving no pleasure at all because you are on your period or can't physically allow him inside? Of course not! It would be selfish to think so and oral sex is the best alternative.
If a woman feels that she doesn't want to please a man orally, or if she feels that just because she can't have have her needs met, he shouldn't either, then it is indicative that she is selfish and does not believe in sacrifice. If a woman conveys that she is selfish and doesn't believe in sacrifice through her unwillingness to please a man orally then yes it can break a relationship or arrangement, or whatever the two has established. Nobody wants to be involved with a selfish person especially when that person is a continual taker and a seldom giver.
Oral sex is what you make of it. I've yet to meet a woman who does not like to receive oral sex and I strongly believe that it's the one aspect of sex that can be taught from one person to their partner, unlike intercourse. I don't believe you can teach a person how to "tango" 'tween the sheets. Either you have it or you don't. Although it's no longer taboo ladies still seem to have some inhibitions regarding oral sex which is understandable because women never want to seem like a whore. After all, young men didn't always like to admit that they engage in oral sex with women because you would get made fun of by your homies. All in all, oral sex can make a relationship ten times better if both parties buy into it. Conversely it could destroy the relationship if one party decides they don't want to partake in the act. If one party gives oral sex at any point then it should be reciprocated throughout the duration of the relationship.
Heads up ladies, what you won't do, another woman is more than willing to do to/for your man...but that's just What JLB Thinks.
LOL TOO FUNNY - Click pic to really get a good look...at LBJ's face and his boy Melo's too! LMAO
Whodini had a song back in the days entitled "Friends" and I as I type this you probably hear the melody ringing in your mind..."How many of us have them? Friends! Ones we can depend on."
I use the term friend very loosely and even that is an understatement. To me I feel like some people are placed into your life for a reason, others for a brief interval of time, a season if you will.
Anybody who has a grandmother who has ever preached to them about anything, has heard the old saying or a derivative of the saying "You have to know people for all four seasons."
Usually that applies to relationships, but in most cases relationships are friendships that have blossomed into something much more.
There are three types of friendships that I would like to dissect and discuss in today's lesson, none of which you will find in your Webster's or your Britannica. The friend types are as follows:
Circumstantial/seasonal friends, mutual friends, and TRUE friends.
The first group of friends I mentioned are the circumstantial/seasonal friends. The reason why I chose to dissect these first because these are the most prevalent type of friends that you will encounter in life. Circumstantial/seasonal friends are those that come into your life due to a given circumstance and generally you hear from them during a given time of year (season) or they only stick around/are loyal to you for that given season. These friends are super easy to distinguish from the rest, primarily because the basis of your friendship isn't really substantial. These are the friends that you are friends with because you were paired up as roommates in college, or if you're the opposite sex and you're only friends because one or both of you are in a relationship and don't want to cheat, but secretly you have the hots for each other. Or my favorite scenario of them all, you don't want to be in a serious relationship with them, so all you choose to refer to them as, is your "friend." These types of friends are great while they last but, like summer or winter, they eventually come to an end only to return later down the road, making it cyclic to some degree. The friendship itself is totally dependent upon the circumstance and these types of friends won't be there through the thick, just usually through the thin. You'll spot it once you have a disagreement and you're no longer friends. These friends in particular may decide to resurface or you may discover new ones just like them due to the circumstance, henceforth, Circumstantial/seasonal friends.
For me the circumstantial/seasonal friends were females 99% of the time. Females who I could only consider friends because in my mind the relationship would never advance beyond that or in a few instances where the relationship ended and it would never go back to the way it was thus only being "friends" due the circumstances. The other one percent were males who were only my friend as long as we had the same classes, or lived in the same dorm, or played on the same teams. When I was younger and didn't understand the difference I expected a lot from these individuals, but as I grew wiser I was able to foresee a short life expectancy for the "friendship." It should be to no one's surprise that once they jumped ship, it effected my life only in a positive way...one less gift to worry about during the holiday SEASON.
The next type of friend you will encounter in your life is the mutual friend. These friends can sometimes be the debris of a destroyed circumstantial/seasonal relationship. These are the friends you met while in a relationship with somebody else or who were friends with your seasonal friends but they have chosen to remain friends with you. The flip side to the mutual friend is that many of the topics that are discussed could pertain to your recently removed friend. If you acquired this friend as a result of a circumstantial friendship with somebody else and they are any good to you, they won't trouble you with the nonsense of that person that linked you two in the first place. These friends can have the tendency to be biased so you have to watch what you say because it may cause even more friction than that of which was already created. Not all mutual friends are those of a former friend. Some mutual friends are just friends that you only talk to when you visit, or hang out with one of your true friends. When these friends do something that is very questionable you most likely say "That's _____'s friend," and you don't mean anything negative by it. What you really mean is that your friend who knew them the longest must assume full responsibility of that person's negligence.
I have mutual friends that fall on both sides of the spectrum. My mutual friends who I met through former friends/relationships are those I speak to on occasion, usually about safe topics that won't lead to any drama, unless I'm pulled into it. I generally try to keep away from that, but it happens. I also have mutual friends who shall remain nameless, that do some questionable things every time we hang out or go on a trip and I must make it clear of which friend of mine was a friend of his first, so he can assume FULL RESPONSIBILITY FOR HIS NEGLIGENCE.
Last but certainly not least are the true friends. These friends are the ones you talk to frequently and even in some rare cases you don't talk to them so frequently but when you do, you are reminded of all the things that brought you two together as friends in the first place. I said previously I use the word friend so loosely because these are the types of people who, no matter what you do, no matter what you say, no matter how bad you slip up, no matter how bad they slip up, your friendship does NOT change. By some chance it does change, it changes for the better and brings you two closer together. These are the people you love as family, whose kids you would spank if they weren't around lol, whose parents are like a second set of parents to you, whose belongings are your belongings, most importantly these people really hold you down. True friends are the people you truly can't not live without and truly have made a significant impact on your life and will continue the trend until death do you part.
It's crazy for me because marriage is not something that I think about on the regular but when I think of who my true friends are I think about if I were to wed, who would be my groomsmen and how many of them would I have. Or in some instances I think if I only could have X amount of groomsmen who would get selected. Each day it gets tougher, which makes me thankful that I won't be getting married anytime soon lol. I say true friends are truly your friends because you speak to them on the regular, but that's only one side of it. I was talking to one of my best friends just two weeks ago about one of my best friends from my childhood, that I lost touch with once I got to college. A few days later I got an email from that friend who I hadn't seen or heard from in like 4-5 years...crazy right? You may think well, the one friend told him to hit you up...That's not it either, because they aren't friends. It was such a coincidence that it added to my inspiration for this blog entry. I also have true friends who unfortunately for them I have to break it off with because of some circumstantial bullshit that I try to look past and work through, but I'm getting no cooperation on the other end. Normally I wouldn't stress it but this circumstantial bullshit is effecting my financial situation in a negative way. I can't remain friends with somebody who knows that their negligence in a joint venture has caused negative effect on me financially and could care less. That's not what true friends do.
People are in your life for reasons, people are in your life for seasons. I was always taught that you have to know people for four seasons before you can fully say you know that person because quite frankly, people act differently, during different times of the month or year. I chose to write this blog about friends because I think a lot of times people misunderstand what the meaning of a friend should be. Each person's idea won't be the same but they should at least share some of the same principles listed throughout the blog. Hopefully this blog has enlightened some and entertained all. What I'd like to say in closing is just because a person is classified as one of the three types of friends doesn't mean they can not progress or in some cases regress into one of the other friend types. Seasonal friends can grow into true friends, mutual friends can as well. What has happened to me most recently is one my true friends has slipped into a seasonal friend and is making no effort to do his part in conjunction with my efforts, to correct a terrible financial situation for the both of us, which is why I now fully understand the motivation for Whodini's "Friends."
How many of us truly have them?
In the spirit of the Olympic games knocking at the door, I decided to post this hilarious clip of KB24 and the boys of the classic show "Jackass," enjoy!
My Thoughts on CNN's Black In America: The Black Woman and Family
Posted by JLB Labels: Media, PoliticsLet me dive head first into this blog by saying, SELDOM do I watch CNN for any purpose whatsoever.
BUT!
My good friend and former classmate tells me that he only watches it for election coverage...COOL, I guess.
The fire that has ignited within my core is not so much a result of CNN's "Black In America" and the content that it entailed but more credited to all my brothers and sisters who made sure to "spread the word" about this show and thought it was the absolute best thing since pants with pockets.
Like I said previously I don't watch CNN unless there's some breaking story ie 9/11 or the Virginia Tech incident. Other than that I have no interest in anything that airs on that biased network.
Fortunately for me and those of you who are faithful to the blog, I was dropping off something to a coworker of mine and the show was on. Now when I see "Black In America" on TV, immediately I'm gravitated towards it, because I want to see how much of a mockery they will actually make of the Black race.
Surprisingly enough, this program didn't do that.
Okay so I'm lying, the very first thing I saw midway through the program was a segment on interracial dating, marriages, etc. There was a sister on there, who wrote the script for the film "Something New" where Sanaa Lathan was dating a white guy. Then it somehow transitioned into how Chris Rock said to the woman that she should exercise her option to date out of her race as brothers been doing it for years. Agreed. Then it cut to a married couple (black woman/white man) who had two children. The father was concerned because his toddler son said he "feels like he's white." He goes into this whole bit about how his son is black AND white. Agreed, yet again. What I don't agree with is how the mother was like she is surprised at how children accept their biracial kids. For what!?!? Kids don't care about that nonsense, kids see other kids, and kids do kid shit. The class of children isn't as sophisticated as the cartoon Rugrats would depict, where children indulge in elaborate forums and discuss who doesn't fit the bill because of their parents. As for the father, he better be glad that his son is identifying himself as being white, because when he gets old enough to drive he'll be pulled over for no reason by police, harassed, and white daddy or not, won't get the approval from little Amber's parents if he shows up at their home for their first date.
When they cut from this segment to commercial it segued so perfectly into the most inspiring commercials of all...McDonald's! Yes McDonald's. What was this commercial I've never seen about? A black family going to McDonald's, being "served" by more black people, not a white person in sight at McDonald's and another satisfied black family fed with the $1 Menu in this era of increased prices for eggs, milks and...gasolina. Well at least that's what you would have thought if you were blind. Instead this commercial pumps more cholesterol into the already clogged arteries found in the heart of the black community. What I'm speaking of in this instance is obesity and the inability of BLACK people to land a decent job IN AMERICA, except for McDonald's, every black kids' first-class ticket out of poverty and into the lower class. "Now that Calvin, he's really going places." Now that's an accurate depiction of being "Black In America."
When the program picked back up from commercial they uncovered the James Earl Ray of the women in the black community. Several women gave their stories on being HIV positive or dealing with brothers who they don't trust, yet have unprotected sex with. That makes a whole lot of sense doesn't it. CNN did all us black people a favor by telling us how at risk we are for catching HIV and AIDS, and even pulled T.D. Jakes out his million dollar estate to have him speak on the ideology of abstinence and the realities of people not being abstinent, but more realistic ie "safe" in their patterns. What would I know to do with a condom if it wasn't for CNN? "Make me a bicycle clown!" Let's face it, HIV and AIDS are no secret to "Blacks In America." What is a secret is why you'll never hear a story of the wealthy (white) people diagnosed with HIV or AIDS like it was in the 80s and early 90s. What I will say is that it's not because they are safer than black people, or are they? Nor did CNN touch on the origin of AIDS and how it became so prevalent, IN JUST THE BLACK COMMUNITY. Does anybody know what was CNN's point in this segment? I stopped paying attention. Oh wait! It was about promiscuous blacks, and their inabilities to stay disease free, but Negroes all around the world, were locked in, word for word. The message in this segment wasn't "wrap it up," because AIDS can kill you. AIDS is real, so use protection niggers, because you can't afford the cure. Plain and simple.
This segment to no surprise was followed by a commercial break, advertising the "Perilous" lands of "Africa." I'm watching this shit like "are you fucking kidding?" The ad was about starvation, hunger, more disease in the "land of peril." How dare you go on air deeming the Mother land, the cradle of ANY civilization, the "land of peril." I was disgusted, utterly disgusted. They ran this commercial at least twice by my count during this "Black In America" program.
After this commercial break they returned with some segment about a kid who was paralyzed due to gun violence. They proceeded to educate us blacks on how prevalent homicide is in the black community. If I didn't know any better I'd say CNN is for and from the hood. Not because of the abundance of knowledge that was aired during this program, but because in the hood, you got that one nuisance that shares well known knowledge with the rest of the neighborhood as if it is a mystery or a secret, when in fact, they were the last to know. But as I said before, Negroes were glued to the boob tube, word for word. By this final segment I was convinced that this show was another one of CNN's ploys and I was not going to fall victim to it.
What Ploy you ask?
Well I'm glad your reading instead of watching CNN. BTW how many of you know what CNN stands for? Cable News Network? Nope! Chaining Noosing Niggers, ha! Bet you didn't see that one coming.
Let's face it, EVERYBODY by now knows that FOX messed up bad with their deliberate attempts to link Obama to terrorism by intentionally referring to him as Osama or calling him a Muslim on more than one occasion. That in itself has a psychological effect on people who don't know much about Obama or what his politics are. Hearing Osama being the mastermind behind the terrorist attack of 9/11 (in conjunction with G Dubbya), somebody who is voting for the first time in a heavy republican area would think, "there's no way I'm voting for a Muslim man named Osama after 9/11." Even if his name isn't Osama, it's close enough.
Somebody spent some serious R&D (Research&Development) coming up with a way to win over the black audience:
"What's the best bait to reel in a nigger? Fried Chicken! Watermelon! No, that's too obvious, let's give them two television specials on back to back nights and air it on our network, have a few familiar black faces in it, and they'll think we're hip, they'll think we're down. Ha ha ha! Poppycock."
I'm pretty sure the meeting of the minds at CNN went something like that and it pains me to say this but, it worked. Because not only was nearly every "Black In America" watching this program, but they are going to watch a follow up special about Black Men specifically, which airs Thursday July 24, 2008 at 9 p.m.
What the niggers who were stuck in front the idiot box aren't aware of is CNN is owned by Time-Warner, which merged with AOL. What these same "Blacks In America" don't know is that Time-Warner and its subsidiaries are super conservative (much like Murdoch and FOX). What these coons and bafoons don't know is that CNN, much like Jeezy da Snowman, "Fucks with McCain,"and also has a history of being a big time donor to the republican party. Ask G.W. about the $1.6 Million he got for his campaign in 2000.
SURPRISE!
You've been bamboozled, ham-hocked, led astray, run amuck yet again. This may not lead to another form of slavery (because it's already been implemented through the institution of the penitentiary in America) but these recent CNN hopper-on-ers have fell in the bear trap of supporting CNN from here forth thus being brainwashed into oblivion through their methods of misinforming the masses with their versions of the news, which will ultimately steal votes from Osama.
(R.I.P.) BIG PUN, Intended.
Check this piece from Elder Godfrey Patterson (Snowhill, MD) courtesy of ADubproductions:
Another good friend and colleague of mine told me how a young lady encouraged him to watch "Black In America" and he said simply, "Miss, I've been Black In America my entire life."
Church!
Men are dogs and we as men can agree with that to some degree.
No matter how much we try at times we can do some questionable things that would get us sent to the "dog house." The dog house in lamens terms means your not on your lady's good side.
Today I read an article that was so unbelievable that I absolutely had to post about a Russian woman in St. Petersburg, FL that took the term "dog house" to an all new height. She was so pissed at her drunken husband who was passed out on the pull out couch, (which she probably forced him to sleep on) that she kicked the handle that folds and unfolds the couch, causing the couch to fold up, thus killing the man.
She took him to the "dog house" alright...Mike Vick's dog house. Here's the link to the full story:
http://www.msnbc.msn.com/id/25606488/
Hoes! Hoes! You's a Hoe, I said that you's a Hoe! Hoe!
Luda's first album is still my favorite album and this song rings in my head each time I hear about some skank whore who wants to write a book about her promiscuous behavior with celebrities.
Alana Wyatt, video hoe, turned celebrity wife, turned self-made author, has a book entitled "Breaking the Code of Silence." Usually I don't even waste my time mentioning these hoes but this one stuck out to me.
This hoe stuck out to me because she is separated but still legally married to one of my favorite rappers, Mos Def. Wyatt is a half Italian half Jamaican woman from Toronto, who swears up and down she didn't know who Mos Def was until she met him...96 hours later they were married, go figure!
Wyatt's book "Breaking the Code of Silence" is a "motivational book" she calls it. Wyatt also said in a recent interview that "This is not a tell-all book, if it was, Karrinne Steffans and Carmen would have NOTHING ON ME."
WOW!
Wyatt can be seen in the "Drop It Like It's Hot" vid, Murphy Lee's "What the Hook Gon Be," and Donnell Jones' "Where I Wanna Be." In this book she talks of her 4 month marriage with Mos and her previous endeavours with NBA ballers such as Jermaine O'Neal, Antawn Jamison, and even the Big Diesel (Tell me how my ass taste!)
What I find so funny about this broad is that she repeated says that she's not a hoe, and she doesn't seek any kind of gain from dealing with these guys until they approach her but her son's father is Socrates a huge rapper in Toronto, she just recently got a $4 Million settlement from Mos Def, and she talks about numerous ballers who flew her around the world and kept $ in her accounts. Like I said, she says she don't look for any financial gain yet she says "of course I need $4,000 before I fly to come see you" when speaking of her numerous escapades.
I don't want to go any deeper in this but here's the interview
Happy 4th!! I know the 4th of July has passed already but I was too busy grilling and catching so-called summer blockbusters to deliver on time.
Big Willie's new flick Hancock is just "okay." It's funny as hell throughout, Will Smith plays a hell of a homeless, super-hero, but sadly the storyline doesn't live up to the expectation. It's corny to be blunt.
http://www.suntimes.com/lifestyles/health/1039905,CST-NWS-viagra04.article
In the spirit of the summer and the new NaS (Untitled) album that was originally slated to be released under the title Nigger, I'd like to dedicate this blog to watermelon and chicken or what has grown to become the so called "Nigger Shit."
I have an advanced copy of NaS' new album and it is the 2nd best album I've heard this year, next to Seeing Sounds but it is the best Hip-Hop album I've heard this year. I'm not going to give an in depth album review like I did with Tha Carter III because quite frankly only the "best rapper alive" deserves that kind of Dedication on my blog...right!
What I will do is drop this sick metaphor which is a direct quote from NaS on the track entitled Fried Chicken featuring Busta Rhymes, because believe it or not, there are still busters who haven't heard this song. So here it goes:
"Fried Chicken, Fly Vixen. Gimme heart disease but I need u in my kitchen. U a bird, but ain’t a key. Got wings but u can’t fly away from me. Driving in ur bucket seats all the way from Kentucky to fuck wit me. Look what u done to me, who’s number one to me. After u shower, u and ur gold medal flour. Then u rub ya hot oil for bout a half an hour. U in ya hot tub, I’m lookin at you salivating. Dry u off I got ur paper towel waiting. Lay u down cuz ur red hot, Louisiana style u make my head rot. Then I fly to the bed then plop. When we done I need rest. Don’t know what part of u I love best. Your legs or your breast, Mrs. Fried Chicken u gon be a nigga death. Created by southern black women to serve master guests. You gon be a nigga death. Mrs. Fried Chicken you was my addiction, drippin wit High Cholest. Like Greeks wit its falafel, like Italians wit its tomato pasta, what roti is to a Rasta. Trapping me, you and your friend mac and cheese, candied yams, collard greens, but u knockin me to my knees. It’s killin me when I’m this high. Nothing I need more than a fish fry---"
I don't know about you, but I'm hungry, does Popeye's deliver?
Next piece of this "Nigger Shit" pie revolves around every black persons favorite fruit, watermelon...sure!
On July 4th 2008, the Chicago Sun Times published an article that read Watermelon contains and ingredient called citruline which is found in...VIAGRA, yes granddad Niagra! It proceeded to say that this ingredient relaxes the blood vessels like Viagra does and could have the same effect sans the side effects if you eat enough watermelon. Six cups to be exact. Here's the link to the full story:
So you know I had to try it. I've been at attention like a "private" at basic training ever since.
Seriously though, I don't even like watermelon to the point where I'd be able to keep down six cups. Contrary to popular belief, black people don't love watermelon that much. In fact Japanese people love it more. Yes! I said it! The Japanese! If you don't believe me then Google "Japanese sells watermelon for $6100." Then tell me that Japanese don't like watermelon more, maybe he got the tip about the Viagra-esqe effects, lol but that's What JLB Thinks.
Today's post is one that I have been prolonging for the simple fact that I just did not want to touch on it. I tried to stay away from it and wait for it to come to me before I discuss it with you all. Well that day arrived yesterday and if you're reading this while on the time clock at your job, I suggest you save this for later. What I want to do today is is open the door and invite you to enter, racial relationships.
It's no secret that I'm a knowledgeable man when it comes to wireless devices. Yesterday this young Brother who could not have been any older than 12 years old came up to me and asked me if I had any idea what was wrong with his cell phone because he could no longer send or receive text messages. Immediately I'm thinking "who the hell are you texting anyway at your age?" but I was a kid once, I underwent puberty, so I smiled when it hit me that's the age when girls scouts start looking good, and the boy scouts start to pitch tents...in their pants.
So I smiled at the kid and told him not to worry, I'd get his phone up and running in no time. So I asked him to give me the phone so I could look at it and there is this picture of a little girl on his wallpaper. A non-black girl at that. Immediately I was taken back by this because for one I was not expecting to see a little girl on his wallpaper and even if I was expecting it, I would have never guessed it would be a non-black girl. I say non-black because I'm not sure what her ethnicity was. So I asked the young Brother, "who is this your girlfriend?" and he replied "Yes." Immediately after he responded he got this timid look on his face as if he knew what my next question was, like he had been battling this demon, since he put the picture up. So I had to ask, he's a young Brother, I need to know these things. I asked "You get the panties yet?"
I'm kidding I didn't ask him that!
I didn't ask him anything. Once he said that was his girlfriend I smiled and did what he asked me to do which was get his phone working again. He thanked me for it and he went on about his business, his non-black business I assume.
Interracial relationships are so much more common in 2008 then they were in 1958 yet it's still frowned upon by a boat load of people, no pun intended.
I said I was taken back because I wouldn't expect a brother so young to have a girlfriend who wasn't of his ethnic background. Beauty is beauty don't get me wrong, but when you're young you don't understand, which is another reason why I smiled at the situation. When I was that age, I had a non-black girlfriend, I think she was from Saudi-Arabia or something. To this day I don't really know. It didn't matter to me that she wasn't black, all I cared about was that I liked her, and she liked me back. That's all that mattered.
In 2008 that's all that should matter, but sadly it doesn't matter to people who are on the outside looking in. When I had that girlfriend my mom didn't even like her calling the house. Not because I was too young to talk on the house phone to a girl, but when my mom answered the phone, the girl "sounded white." That in itself is the most ridiculous thing ever, but hey that was the deal. That's my mom and I love her for everything she is and isn't. The girl sounded white and it pissed my mom off and she was rude to the girl every time she called. Come to think of it my high school sweetheart, if you want to call her that, has a "white name," "sounded white" when she called, and the first time my mom saw her, her face hit the floor.
What I realize now that I'm older is that my mom wanted the best for me, and in her eyes the best for me was what she had always envisioned for me. Needless to say that wasn't some "white" girl or "white sounding" girl. I never understood how one could sound or act a color but people say it all the time.
America puts on this front as if there are no more racial tensions and everything is equal but it's not and I think that's the biggest reason why women, generally Black women, don't like the idea of a Black man with any other ethnic group. To a Sister it comes across like "white women can have anything in the world, they got to have Black men too!?!?" I use the word Sister for a lot of reasons, one being the fact that they are MY SISTERS as one of my best friends says. It should be painfully obvious that they are MY SISTERS because they are not HIS, although, he like me, is a Black man. He's my boy and I love him like a brother, but he prefers non-black women and we debate about this all the time. He swears that his mentality is not that he doesn't like Black women, it's that he prefers anything other than Black and if she is Black by no means can she be BLACK, she has to be light, bright, almost white or white. Anything other than Black.
That's his thing, I'm not mad at him, I'm all for his success but the problem is what he does is generalize much of what a man experiences with a Sister as a scenario that you will only experience with a Sister. I use this friend of mine as an example because he represents much of what is wrong with the world. The world is brainwashed into Whitney Houston, crack head delusions that Black "is wack." For instance if a conversation comes up when all our boys get together and somebody mentions how a Sister got mad over something that seemed insignificant, to him his reasoning is justified. In reality WOMEN in general have the tendency to get upset over things that seem insignificant to men. It's a woman thing. It's not an ethnic thing.
I personally prefer a Sister over any other race and that's the norm. There are more people on earth who prefer their own kind over another because there are just some things that as a Black man you won't understand about the hispanic culture or the white woman won't understand about the Black culture, or whatever the interracial combo is. I find a lot of women from different ethnic backgrounds to be extremely attractive but the flip side is I've seen more attractive Sisters than any other ethnic group of women, but that's me.
Let a Sister tell it, Brothers sell out to white women because they aren't strong enough to deal with a Black woman. That may be true but I'm not 100% sure about that. What I am sure about is Sisters hate to see attractive brothers with white women. Sisters are already self conscious about enough things as it is and seeing that doesn't help. They feel as if white women are sluts and submissive and essentially become slaves to the Black penis because they'll do whatever a Black man tells them to do sexually or in general. I'm not sure about whether that is the case because I'm not proficient in the art of the snow bunny (white woman). What I do know is that there are a few guys who have had one or two white women and they feel like they are all kinky.
LET ME GO ON RECORD AND SAY THIS, BLACK WOMEN ARE KINKY TOO!
I'll admit it, I don't know much about snow bunnies and honestly I don't care to know about them. I have white friends that I hang out with, but I don't like hanging out in the places they frequent because there is always a group of "smoking hot" white women who'll approach us and they're all giddy and what not, and then they're snickering to one another like "who's the token?" That in itself is enough to turn me off of white women.
Hispanic women get the pass because generally they grow up in urban areas or in areas in there native land that resemble the "ghettos" of America. Hispanic women in they eyes of Black women are lighter skinned Sisters who just so happen to be fluent in another language.
Asian women aspire to be white women because they get "white washed" causing them to lose any connection with their ancestry and in turn they adopt the white American practices and way of life. In the eyes of a Sister, she's a CaucASIAN.
Two women were having a conversation around me, one of which was Pakistani the other was Nigerian. They were speaking on their preferences and how they would only marry men from their respective countries. The Pakistani girl asked the Nigerian girl whether or not she has ever dated an "American" and her response was "hell no, I only date Nigerians." The Nigerian girl in turn asks me if I ever dated a Nigerian girl and I responded accordingly...
"HELL NO!" And she wants to look at me like I'm crazy after she just disrespected me and every Brother from America. Then to add insult to injury she proceeds to say "If you ever get a chance to date one, you should. We're the best." Ha! Okay Khaled.
Granted I love my Sisters, but it's no secret that "most Africans don't like us no way." (Nas) When it comes to our Sisters from the mother land, Nigerian women don't do it for me. Quite frankly I don't like them for the simple fact that I've met about 15 in my lifetime. I'd say 14 of them were rude bitches, who hated Americans and I'd say 15 of them were all unattractive to me.
I think that if the world was truly equal and everybody had the same opportunities or went through the same hardships, the race thing wouldn't be an issue but it is. You don't believe me?Brothers go to Waco, TX and try to make a pass at some white women and see how many times it takes you to rope one in, if you don't get roped from a tree first.
I, JLB, find that there are attractive women in all ethnic groups but I have to spread a few words of advice for my Brothers who think "black is wack." Brothers, if you are going to go out and get you a WHITE WOMAN what you must do, and this is an absolute must; YOU MUST get you a WHITE WOMAN that is more attractive then any of the Sisters you could have had. You can not get a WHITE WOMAN who is average or below average in the looks department because all you do is further prove Sisters right by saying you're weak because you would rather date an average white woman than an upper echelon Sister. I guarantee you, that if you have a white woman such as the one I just described, you'll still be hated by your fellow Sisters, but it won't be because you didn't make a quality decision, it'll be because you've found one that upstages all the Sisters you know.
In closing, what made the encounter with the young Brother with the cell phone so significant is that he represents what the world should be. He likes his girl and she likes him back, what everybody else thinks doesn't matter. When you're that age you're completely oblivious to the subtle racial divides such as the best schools in the area being the white schools, which I'm sure he attends. Black, Brown, White, Yellow whatever. If it makes you happy I will never tell you to do otherwise, but I will put your ass in check if you think your avoiding "drama" or "bull crap" by dating women in another ethnic group. Ironically, what you're really doing is signing up for a different kind of drama that you're oblivious to, because you're not a member of that ethnic background. Go Obama!
I encourage everybody to leave feedback on this one because I really want to know what you all think in comparison to What JLB Thinks.
What's up kinfolk! In my absence from What JLB Thinks I've been doing some in depth thinking. For those of you who keep up with the blog and leave feedback religiously I really do appreciate the love. To show my appreciation for you all I'm going to utilize the next paragraph to blog about myself. Everything that follows will be standard protocol conversations, stories, music etc that will come together as one to form today's post.
Let's face it "I'm living two different lifes one in the day, you at night. Even though this ain't right I just can't get enough." (Songz) I'm living two different lives and I do everything I can to stay on the straight and narrow, but it's easier said than done. The more and more I try to tell myself I have to stay true to just one, the harder it is for me to stay away from the other. I mean I have time invested, years even. So I can't just quit one to give my all to the other. I'm only human. It's so easy to become complacent and it's even more easy to be tempted by the powers that be, to wake up in the middle of the night to put in work when I know that I could potentially face consequences the next morning. So I take chances such as this to lay it all out there for you all to read, to get a little more insight as to What JLB Thinks about his own personal experiences. Double dipping isn't usually my thing, but I've come to the conclusion that I'm going to continue with this life of mine and continue to stick with the years I've invested in my ever so stagnant full-time job, meanwhile flirting with my love of writing when I'm tempted...
If you thought I was talking about anything other than that, do you have a lot to learn?!?!
On a more serious note, anybody who listens to R&B has probably heard "Last Time" by Trey Songz where he sings about the love for his main lady and the lust for his side dish. Such a frequent story in music and entertainment. IT NEVER GETS OLD no matter how many people write about it. We the people, simply eat it up.
A few days ago when I was contemplating how to overcome this Comcast obstacle I got a call from one of my close friends who will remain nameless. For the sake of reference we'll call this friend of mine "X."
X calls me because X has a dilemma about Y. X and Y have been dating for a year. Didn't sound like much of a dilemma at first, but X tells me about Z who works at the same location with X and they've been flirting back and forth for months. The flirting eventually manifested into "Backseat Love," which in lamens terms means sex for all you N.E.R.Ds out there. So X and Z been getting it popping quite frequently and X wants it to end. The problem is X can't put an end to it because Z's loving is just that good. Y has no idea because X has been doing everything X has done from day one to keep Y happy. So X asked What JLB Thinks about this situation, but Y? lol...ok so what if it was corny.
First of all I think I confused myself trying to protect the innocence of my friend. But all them damn X's and Y's brought back night terrors of Algebra and I have chills lol.
Like I said earlier in the post, this is a frequent scenario in entertainment, but regular people go through these kinds of things as well.
As far as what I think, if you or anybody you know has ever been faced with this situation, the first thing you/them must do is realize that cheating is never good and you should automatically assume that because you've betrayed them, either they or the next, will do the same to you, it's called Karma.
Once you've made acquaintance with Karma and acknowledge that what has occurred is wrong, you have to decide what you want to become of the situation. Determine whether you want one of the two or whether you want them both. Yes I said both, because contrary to popular belief, you can have your cake and eat it too! What good is cake that you can't eat? The downside to the cake is its merely a snack, a dessert, if you will. It's a bonus and it isn't sufficient enough to keep you nourished.
Once you've acknowledged what you what to become of all this mess, you have to address it straight on. As a man you're probably going to want to keep your main woman because she does all the little things that make her so much more valuable than any other. As a woman, who's reading this, you're thinking, "why cheat?" if she's so valuable. Well woman, I don't have an answer for that!
Why cheat? Let me say that by no means do I condone cheating but it's a part of the game. Belichick did it, Tim Donaghy did it, it happens. What I will say in the defense of men is that men cheat, not because their woman is not good enough, but for the simple fact that the sex can be a little predictable and men enjoy the thrill of something different from what you have. I like to look at it as a nutritious diet, being faithful that is. I look at it that way because to eat right you have to be disciplined, you have to understand the long term effects of eating right, and you must not be so easily susceptible to temptation. Cheating on the other hand is just like cheating your diet. You figure a little bit here and there is unhealthy, but it won't kill you. The most tempting foods to someone on a diet can be the most addictive such as sweets and caffeine. Cheating can become addictive.
That's if you're a man of course. It's not even close to being that complex for a woman. "Women stepping out for love, men do it to cum." (Big Pooh) If a genuinely good girl cheats it is because she's fed up and there's nothing you can do about it. She's scorned, but if she's a slut or a whore or a slore (slut+whore), then she probably pulled some wool over your eyes in the beginning and led you to believe she was genuine. That's it. Women are so complex yet not so much in terms of cheating.
Now that we got why one cheats out of the way it's time to look at what you've decided you want out of the whole situation and attack it head on. If you want the cake and to eat it too, just revert to the 80/20 rule and come to grasps with the fact that it's not going to end in your favor because what goes around comes around. If you want your relationship to end, simply tell the person you want to break it off and that you rather go your separate ways because you want to enjoy the benefits of a single life. It'll benefit you in the long run. If your anything like X, you're going to be in a bit of a pickle seeing as how X wants to come off the regimen and have that devil's food every once in a while because it's so delicious. The problem with that is eventually the side dish will approach you with the inevitable, "what are we?" or my favorite "where is this going?" formerly known as the libido killers because you'll probably be asked this prior to sex, UNLESS you're a side dish to your side dish, which is rare. If you're anything like X you must cut back on the side dish drastically because its inevitable that one of you will begin to develop feelings. If you have any brains in your head the one thing you should never do, regardless of how bumpy the road has become, leave the one you've invested so much time in, for the new and more convenient person because IT NEVER WORKS OUT...NEVER!!!
In closing, there's too much at risk when you cheat. Chances are your significant other is blowing your phone up while you're out doing your dirt. You can't answer the phone because your side dish doesn't know and you don't want them to overhear nor do you want to to play the question game with your significant other who hasn't had anything to say all day but suddenly wants to talk up a storm. No matter what excuse you use it won't be good enough, and when it rolls around that those previously used excuses have become realities, your significant other won't believe you thus making the road that much more bumpy. The best thing I can say to X is chalk it up, you've had your fun, now get back to the one. That's the one that's been there, and that's the one that will be there. So don't risk throwing it all away for lust. Tell Z that it was fun while it lasted but it was strictly a physical thing.
That's What JLB Thinks
It's no secret I've been away from the blog posting. I apologize for neglecting you all but me and Comcast haven't been the best of friends lately.
BUT! This is the last time, no more neglect!! Scouts honor!
But I said that the last time!
SMH!!
So there's this cat named Mitchell Rose, or some shit...Former boxer, now attorney served up subpoenas at two of the 40/40 club locations for a suit for $88 Million from Jigga man for copyright infrigement. Homie claims he slid Hov his demo tape a few years back and on the demo he's whispering on certain breaks of his tracks to emphasize his lyrics. Homie also claims that he began developing artists and before his artists could make it big to demonstrate this new "style" of "whispering" Jay-Z had took it and ran with it. First a diamond hand sign and now this? Everybody's trying get paid I guess.
In other news Weezy's projected to be platinum by this week and Nas has a new mixtape available in addition to his recently released 8min "Be A Nigger Too" video. Little Brother also releases an iTunes album with pre "Getback"tracks from "...And Justus for All the Mixtape" (2007) hosted by Mick Boogie, and also the "Good Clothes mixtape" (2007). LB's new installment is entitled what else, ...And Justus For All, no kidding? Good to see my boys still trying to stay relevant.
Ladies and Gents the verdicts are in, the case is closed. On a freaky Friday the 13th of 2008, Robert Kelly officially became a free man, acquitted on not one, but ALL 14 counts of child porn. Was there any doubt? I heard Kells actually pissed himself when they acquitted him. Here's a story below from the New York Times that I copied and pasted for you all to read.
CHICAGO — It took more than six years for prosecutors to get the R&B star R. Kelly into court on charges of child pornography. It only took a few hours for a jury to declare him not guilty on all 14 counts.
Mr. Kelly had been accused of making a 27-minute sex tape with an under-age female. But a high-powered defense team convinced the jury of nine men and three women that the identity of the girl was not conclusive.
As the verdicts were being read on Friday, the singer started crying and whispering “Thank you Jesus, thank you Jesus, thank you Jesus,” over and over again, his lawyers said.
Mr. Kelly, 41, whose signature song is “I Believe I Can Fly,” saluted a crowd of his fans as he left court and then put his hand on his heart. He made no remarks, but the impassive face he had worn during the four-week trial showed a flicker of a smile.
In the same courtroom where the trial was conducted, five jurors told reporters that the absence of testimony from the alleged victim was a big handicap. “All of us felt the grayness of the case," one juror said.
As outlined in the prosecution’s opening and closing statements, the case was intended to be clear-cut: the “sweet, nice, lovely” victim was introduced to Mr. Kelly at the age of 12 by her aunt, a protégé of Mr. Kelly’s named Stephanie Edwards. But instead of making the girl a star, Mr. Kelly preyed on her, made her do “vile, disgusting” things and filmed them. Since Mr. Kelly knew she was under age, the state said, he was guilty of making child pornography.
Expert witnesses for the prosecution said that the VHS tape, whose origin is unknown, was a multigeneration copy but had not been tampered with. Prosecutors also pointed out how the man on the tape turned his back briefly to the camera. It was less than a quarter of a second, but enough time to see a mole on his back — just like the one Mr. Kelly has.
While 14 witnesses for the prosecution identified the girl in the tape, and some identified Mr. Kelly as well, only one tied them together in a sexual relationship. That was Lisa Van Allen, who testified that she had a three-way sexual encounter with them.
Ms. Van Allen, who received state and federal immunity to testify, did not appear to be an unimpeachable witness. She told the court that she had first had sex with Mr. Kelly at age 17, immediately after being introduced to him on the set of one of his videos, and admitted that she stole a $20,000 Rolex from him. Her current boyfriend and a former boyfriend are both felons.
The defense team called her a liar and extortionist and compared her, literally, to Satan.
Mr. Kelly’s lawyers, who included Edward Genson, Sam Adam and his son, Sam Adam Jr., filed so many motions that they helped delay the start of the trial for six years. But once in court, the lawyers adopted a minimalist approach, limiting their side of the story to two days. Mr. Kelly did not testify.
At the time this seemed to reveal a weakness of the defense’s case. The defense team never even denied that the tape had been shot in Mr. Kelly’s former home.
As portrayed by Sam Adam Jr. in closing arguments, Mr. Kelly was less predator than prey, the victim of a loose conspiracy by Ms. Edwards, whose career disappeared after a falling-out with the star, as well as Ms. Van Allen and others searching for a payoff, revenge or both.
“This whole thing, from beginning to end, is about money,” Mr. Adam said.
Flailing his arms, he suggested not one but many alternate narratives: that the mole on the back of the man in the film didn’t exist, was a computer blip or was inserted by an unknown someone for nefarious purposes; that the film itself was a fake; that it had computer morphing in it like the dinosaurs in “Jurassic Park”; or that it starred models or prostitutes who looked like Mr. Kelly and his alleged victim.
He proposed that the jury would not recognize the woman, who is now 23, if she were sitting in the courtroom.
“Let’s cut to the chase,” he said. “How do you victimize a person when she says, ‘It’s not me’?”
For good measure, he suggested it was the jury’s patriotic duty to find the singer innocent.
After the verdict, when a reporter asked Mr. Adam if he would now be raising his rates, he smiled broadly and said: “I don’t have any hourly rate. I do everything pro bono when I fight for the innocent like Mr. Kelly.”
The prosecution team, at a post-trial news conference, looked both stoic and shocked.
“Child pornography cases can be extremely difficult in many ways,” said Cook County State’s Attorney Richard Devine, noting that the victims often do not consider themselves victims. “If we receive similar evidence today or tomorrow, we are going to bring that case.”
Leonard Cavise, a professor of law at DePaul University who was skeptical of the prosecutors’ case, said the optimistic way to look at the verdict was that “this is a victory for the concept of reasonable doubt.” The jury, he said, “is saying, ‘We weren’t totally sure it was the girl, we weren’t totally sure it was him.’ ”
The negative way, Mr. Cavise said, would be this: “The jury gave him the extra benefit of the doubt because of who he is, just like the O. J. Simpson jury.”
In some ways, this case did not resemble the Simpson case. R. Kelly is a Chicago success story and still makes his home here, yet as a public spectacle the trial was something of a bust.
The courthouse is in an inconveniently located neighborhood, the charges were old, and allegations of the singer’s interest in under-age women are older still. On most days there was more courtroom security than spectators.
(This article has been copied and pasted from the NYTIMES.COM)
"In the words of Sister Souljah, 'an in justice anywhere, is an injustice...anywhere'" (Boondocks)
Lil Wayne is the self-proclaimed "Best Rapper Alive," since the best rapper retired. Considering the consensus best rapper alive never officially retired, that doesn't make Lil Wayne the best at anything. Wayne's newest installment to Tha Carter trilogy is evidence of this. The likes of Fat Joe and even MTV have gone on record (on air) to say that Birdman J.R. is the best hip hop has to offer. This blog is the official What JLB Thinks review of Tha Carter III. This is a track by track and illustration as to why, this Carter isn't even the BEST of the III.
In order for a champion to repeat they must at first actually win in their sport. Junior introduces us to Tha Carter III with the track entitled 3 Peat. This is your typical get buck in the club production that you could place any southern rapper on and watch them thrive. Heavy 808s chants of "hey" in the background sewn together with a series of sped up strings. This track Wayne gives us his take on why he's the best by saying "I just do this sh*t for my clique like Adam Sandler (Click)/I control hip-hop and he gon' keep it on my channel." After several listens I've decided that this is a decent intro track, but I do feel that it is inappropriately titled.
Mr. Carter feat Jay-Z is the second track on the album and my copy reads it is produced by Mr. Let's Take 'Em to Church himself, the one and only Just Blaze. The production is everything you expect from Just Blaze. Although I must admit it sounds more like a Kanye track to me than anything with the violin play and the sped up sample voice that says "Hey! Mr. Carter tell me where have you been?" during the hook. Honestly this is an average song as far as lyrics are concerned. Neither of the Mr. Carters featured on this track says anything that was particularly hot. Jay-Z officially crowns Lil Wayne as the next Hov in his verse by saying"...sharing mic time with my heir...dope boy I just came off the spoon/Also I'm so fly, I'm on AUTO/Pilot where guys just stare at my wardrobe/I see Euros, that's right plural/I took so much change from this rap game it's your go."
The production throughout this album is solid. Hell it should be with the super producers featured on this record. Track 3 A Milli has got many spins on the radio and on the mixtape circuit and producer Bangladesh proves that you have a banger without being a top dollar producer. Bangladesh can have a future with beats like these. This track is fire, but Wayne messes it up with his senseless flow with lines like "I'm the best like Biggie, Tupac, Andre 3000 where is Erykah Badu at?" Wayne also loses points for this track by removing Corey Gunz' verse off of it for the album version. I guess you can't be the best with younger cats with little to no fame murdering you on your own record.
Track 4 is Wayne's second single Got Money feat T-Pain. I foresaw this collaboration back when we started to hear Pain and Wayne featuring on every body's remixes and singles. This song is the Auto-Tune (Voice box) anthem. If you're not paying attention you could often mistake Pain for Wayne and vice versa. Production is solid yet again, but Wayne ruins it with lines like "I wear so much ice they yell 'skate Wayne!' She wanna f**k Weezy and rape Wayne" and my favorite "Click Clack goes the Black, four fifth/just like it I will blow that sh*t cuz b***h I'm the bomb like tick tick'"
Track 5 really grew on me after like 2 days of playing the album non-stop. It's entitled Comfortable feat Kenneth Babyface Edmonds, produced by Mr. West (Kanye). Man who would have thunk it? Not me! This combo of Wayne and Face, is a winner. I really dig Babyface's soft crooning over the light violins that we hear from Kanye often. The drum pattern is similar of those that we hear from Yay often, but it works. Wayne starts the track about not taking your loved one for granted by saying "To the left to the left/If you wanna leave be my guess you can step/Feeling irreplaceable, listening to Beyonce/Well okay I'll put you out on your B-Day. This is a potential third single for Weezy if he wants to show his other side to the ladies.
Track 6 is the SECOND WORST song on the album and it's produced by my boys (this is, this is this is) Cool & Dre but damn did they miss with this one. It's called Phone Home and has this annoying chant of a hook that goes "Phone home, phone home" over and over. Wayne raps about how he's a martian come to earth to eat all the competition because "hip-hop is my supermarket/shopping cart full of fake hip-hop artists." Wayne has a few good one liners like "no brake lights on my car-rear (career) but the hook makes it unbearable. I like the concept, it gets an A for effort but a failure overall.
Track 7 is my favor cut from this album. It's entitled Dr. Carter produced by Swizz Beatz. The concept of the song in genius. It is about a doctor (Wayne) who has a conversation in between each verse with his nurse about hip-hop acts who suffer symptoms from lack of concepts, no originality, weak flow, no style, no respect for the game, and no swagger. Each verse Wayne performs surgery if you will, on each verse with lines like "Respect is in the heart so that's where I'mma start/And a lot of heart patients don't make it, but hey kid/Plural I graduated and cuz can get through anything if magic made it/That was called recycling or re-reciting something cuz you just like it so you say it just like it/Some say it's bitin' but I say it's enlightin'/Besides, Dr. Kanye West is one of the brightest/And Dr. Swizz can stitch a track up the tightest/And Dr. Jeezy can fix ya back up the nicest/Arhtritis in my hand from writing but I'm a doctor they don't understand my writin'." Ironically all the symptoms Weezy feels are prevalent in hip-hop, he suffers from himself, which in turn prevents this from being the best song on the album. Close second in my opinion.
Track 8 is another track produced by Kanye West and it features Robin Thicke. The name of this track is Tie My Hands. Not the best track I've heard from Kanye by any means, but the message behind and the vocals by Rob are the only reason why I can't completely diss this record because it definitely sounds like a "throw away" beat that Yay didn't want and couldn't move. The song is about Katrina and how residents of New Orleans have been treated like prisoners and considered refugees. This song touches on the pain that's associated with the tragedy and Wayne expresses this in lines like "Every dark cloud has a silver lining."
Track 9 is also produced by Kanye, it's called Shoot Me Down it has a drill/marching type of vibe with the drum pattern, similar to "Jesus Walks" nothing stands out about this song lyrically or production wise (another throw away) and Wayne talks about how he spits "Alcatraz bars I know/and D-Boyz is the only alphabet boys I know."
Track 10, Playin With Fire has a real rockstar vibe to it so it's no surprise that Wayne picked it for a beat. He thinks he's a rockstar in majority of the videos we see him in. Wayne rants and raves about nothing on this song. It offers nothing lyrically with lines like "Osh Kosh B Gosh Posh Spice husband couldn't kick it like I kick it." He does raise a good point when he says "when your great it's not murder, it's assassinate" and he goes on to compare himself to Dr. King and how he's checking into the same hotel, room, screaming "assassinate me bitch!" Not sure where he was going but to these crackers if he was to go, it'd be MURDER in the media, NOT assassinate, next to his name. He does use a recycled verse from a the Drought Is Over 2...Carter 3 Sessions mixtape from the track "World of Fantasy" where he says "Remember your pussy husband used to beat ya..." real Wayne fans won't care hell they ain't even reading this review.
Track 11 is Lollipop somebody save us!
Track 12 is an absolute FLOP, it's HORRIBLE and you got to be on just as much coke and lean that Wayne to sit through the garbage ass track featuring Briscoe and Busta Rhymes. It's called La La produced by David Banner. They missed by a long shot with this one and it should be heard on the pause menu of a Pokemon game, or Willy Wonka mixtape.
Track 13 is entitled Nothin' On Me featuring Faboloso and Juelz Santana and is produced by Alchemist. Finally! Some young talent on the album who can actually rap. Best song on the album and it's because of Fab and Juelz' contributions. Wayne gets on singing and auto tuning, which surprisingly adds to the heat of the record. Fab starts the track off proper and ends his verse with a line in reference to his drop top auto that "is Ocean Drive inspired, so you can "Call A Cab" once ya chick fall for Fab."
Track 14 Let the Beat Build is another gem from the album, produced by Mr. Kanye West. The song does exactly what the title states by allowing the beat to build, by bringing in different aspects of the beat such as the sample voice, 808s, snare,hi-hats at different times. Wayne raps about nothing, but it's so easy to get lost in the beat that you can drown out his nonsense like "I wear red, like a girl's toe, no homo." Classic example of how the production can save a wack record.
Track 15 is called Mrs. Officer I dig this track it features Bobby Valentino and is produced by Wyclef. This song is about a female trooper that pulls Wayne over for any of the crimes you could bring him up on and once he gets in the squad car he spits game to her. I dig the concept, the song is clever and this could be a potential single as well. Only set back on the track is the imitation of a siren that Valentino does with his singing. It sounds like "weeee oooh weee ooooh weee."
Track 16 is the end of Tha Carter III and it uses the same sample as Common's "Misunderstood" from Finding Forever. This song on Tha Carter III is called Misunderstood (ya don't say?). The song offers nothing lyrically, but it's kind of funny towards the end as he has a "long talk monologue shit at the end of the album." (Phonte) Where he disses Rev. Al Sharpton and expresses why he and apparently nobody else likes Al. It's like five minutes long. During this monologue Wayne shows he has a bit of sense with his analysis of blacks in jail, drugs (which he has his P.h.d in) and how drug dealers get taken out of their neighborhoods and sent to jail and replaced with sex offenders and whether that is a coincidence or a "misunderstanding." The most entertaining part of this track is his rambling and not even his rapping.
All in all this album is weak. It did not live up to the hype surrounding it. Let's face it, it's entitled Tha Carter III the guy clearly has no more creativity left and needs to do less features and mixtapes and spend more time in solitude working on his craft. Or seeking out Gillie to write for him so we can experience heat that we did on 500 Degreez and the first Tha Carter installment. On a 10 scale I would give this album a 7. It's an average rap album that we hear nowadays, the producer lineup that consists of Alchemist, Kanye (4), Swizzy, Just Blaze, and Cool and Dre saves the album from being a 5 or a 6 because it is evident that the drugs have gotten to Dwayne and he, like his pappy, suffers from lack of content.
Welcome to today's edition of What JLB Thinks! Hope you all had a great weekend because I certainly did not. I spent the bulk of my weekend thinking of you all and a proper subject to kick the week off with. Me being me I was hit with this topic like a bolt of lightning from the mystical deity of Zeus himself. The topic that I am referring to is the "Double Standard."
"Don't do what I do, do what I say do" is what my dad told me once as a youngster and it has stuck with me ever since. What a huge double standard! As a kid you always want to do things that adults have told you not to do, but they're the reason you did those things in the first place.
As a man when you get older and experience relationships with women, often time the woman will justify her actions by saying you "did or said" the same thing to her. So you must let her know that she can't do what you do because you two are not the same. Double standard indeed, but that's how it has to be.
As a woman it's supercalifragilisticexpialidocious to have like a gazillion male friends who are solely "just friends." Because as women you aren't out to hump every creature of the opposite sex like your male counterparts. (This may be true...partly) But as I said as a woman you could have a gazillion male friends and even talk to your man about them and your man has to accept that because you're a woman and it's okay for a woman to have male friends. Some of which you men will never meet. Conversely, it is not okay in the eyes of a woman, for a man, more specifically HER man, to have a couple or a few female friends. If she does find it okay, she has to meet and inspect her thus she must get a feel for this "friend." ONE is pushing it, but a multiple? You can forget it because in the mind of a woman, he must be "hittin' dat!" Double standard, YET AGAIN!
Those double standards sometimes work in the favor of us males. We can live with our female counterparts having X amount of male friends because what women hate is that we can have sex with as many women we want in pursuit of Wilt's record and be idolized by those who live vicariously through our experiences. If a woman on the other hand just so happens to have sex with two men, who know each other, SHE'S A HOE! Sorry ladies, that's just how the world works. So choose your casual sex wisely young grasshoppers. Double standard.
Last but not least is a serious double standard that was the very log for this fire of a blog post. Sex or should I say the possibility of sex is a major component of the pursuit of a woman. Men don't judge women on the same things she judges a man on. A man can have the freshest of gear, the whitest of smiles, and the heart of Patch Adams but if his life isn't in order, which translates to him being at the same point the woman is in her life, "he loses." (M. Wood) If a woman isn't at the point the man is, but she's still a beautiful and intriguing individual, she still wins. To be even more specific take for instance a man expresses interest in a woman and he is unemployed, has no automobile, has multiple children, and still lives with his mother, he is deemed a LOSER or a deadbeat if you will. Now if a woman has a couple puppies, no ride, lives with mom, and is "in between jobs" she's a victim. Total double standard. Difference is the man would still give the woman a chance, but the woman rules the brother out before it begins. Double standard...but that's just What JLB Thinks
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