Heads Up

Oscar Award winning rap group 36 Mafia has made their career with heavy hitting bass driven tracks that could be heard in the clubs and even in the cars that pass through your neighborhood.

I've never been a fan of 36 but they have a few records that would get me going in the disco. Recently they've put out their own version of lollipop entitled "Lolli Lolli" which is absolutely horrible BUT they've managed to catch my ear with one track off of their latest installment entitled Last 2 Walk.

The name of the track in which I am referring to is "I'd Rather."  We all have things that we'd rather do than go to work or class but this song is of no reference to either.

The chorus says "I love having sex but I'd rather get some head," and that my bloggers, is quite the statement.

I first heard this song on the music channel on cable back on July 4th 2008 and I thought it was hilarious. Not because these guys rather receive oral pleasure than have intercourse but because the chorus is straight forward and doesn't cut any cards. Much like myself.

So as I listened to this song over and over again I began to wonder. How important is oral sex in a relationship? And could it MAKE or BREAK the relationship?

Anybody who says sex isn't as important in a relationship as communication and honesty probably thinks they're a "real boy" and has a father named Jeppetto because that's a load of bull. Sexual chemistry is a major factor in any relationship and two people should be as comfortable sexually with one another as they are having a conversation. Because like I said, both are important factors.

Oral sex is a form of sex that typically is performed as a type of foreplay and in some cases can be a substitute for intercourse. As a man, if you've experienced bad, "ok," and great oral sex you know that it can make a girl you like just a little bit, transform in to a girl you like a lot. I believe that oral sex is extremely important in a relationship and there are several reasons why. 

The first reason it is important is because oral sex or "head" if you will, was taboo for such a long time, especially in the black community but it isn't anymore. Black women would always accuse brothers, and some still do, of running to the white woman because they felt white women are freaky/kinky (givers of the aforementioned head). I saw a comedian once who said in his routine "sisters ain't start giving head until Hennessy became popular." I thought that was the funniest part of his routine because for a long time black women wouldn't perform oral sex and if they did they weren't honest about the fact they did it, because they worried about how they would be perceived. Chris Rock also said in a stand up special "They still make you?" in reference to a woman who said she doesn't give oral. So in 2008 it's expected that women, mainly a black women, partakes in oral sex because it's a new age, and giving "head" is no longer taboo.

The second reason oral sex is important is because there are instances when women can't physically provide intercourse but we as men still have a needs to fulfill.  For instance if a woman has a child, her love canal is in stitches for 6 weeks or so and the man can't row his canoe within it. There is also that week or so every month when women are on their monthly cycles and it is uncouth to engage in intercourse. So I pose this question, to all women: Should a man be reduced to pleasing himself or receiving no pleasure at all because you are on your period or can't physically allow him inside? Of course not! It would be selfish to think so and oral sex is the best alternative. 

If a woman feels that she doesn't want to please a man orally, or if she feels that just because she can't have have her needs met, he shouldn't either, then it is indicative that she is selfish and does not believe in sacrifice. If a woman conveys that she is selfish and doesn't believe in sacrifice through her unwillingness to please a man orally then yes it can break a relationship or arrangement, or whatever the two has established. Nobody wants to be involved with a selfish person especially when that person is a continual taker and a seldom giver.

Oral sex is what you make of it. I've yet to meet a woman who does not like to receive oral sex and I strongly believe that it's the one aspect of sex that can be taught from one person to their partner, unlike intercourse. I don't believe you can teach a person how to "tango" 'tween the sheets. Either you have it or you don't. Although it's no longer taboo ladies still seem to have some inhibitions regarding oral sex which is understandable because women never want to seem like a whore. After all, young men didn't always like to admit that they engage in oral sex with women because you would get made fun of by your homies. All in all, oral sex can make a relationship ten times better if both parties buy into it. Conversely it could destroy the relationship if one party decides they don't want to partake in the act. If one party gives oral sex at any point then it should be reciprocated throughout the duration of the relationship. 

Heads up ladies, what you won't do, another woman is more than willing to do to/for your man...but that's just What JLB Thinks.